Billz Blob

Billz Blob
We are all unique and amazing. With this notion bouncing around inside me I offer to the world what I have to share. The words inside my head have reached to overflowing and in an attempt to keep from exploding I have taken to writing. What follows is the result of purging my mind. If you like what you see, SUBSCRIBE at the top of the page.

In the moment

Jul 5, 2017

no matter how much effort I exert,
no matter how much time I spend contemplating,
no matter how much I worry, fear or hope
I only have control of myself right now.
the future will be a reaction to who I am now and what I do now.


Dreamcatcher BF


Jun 2, 2017

I have been in Turkmenistan for almost one week now and wow what a place! I have spent most of my time working with very little time to explore except the area just around the hotel on day one and most nights in search of dinner. We have had a relatively easy go of it as we have interpreters to help us for must of the day. The reason for the visit is to do a cultural exchange with the Institute of Culture Circus Department and the Turkmen State Circus. We have been received warmly by both groups. Both groups have been extremely generous in sharing their circus and culture with us. In the coming days I will delve into the details of what I hope will be a long friendship between our two circus cultures and our circus families. Do to the internet inconsistencies where I am I may not be able to post again until I return to the US, if you would like to read more check back here in the coming days.

Dreamcatcher BF


May 12, 2017

it is not always easy, it is not always hard.



Feb 7, 2017

I was last in line to be born in my house.
My eyes and my lungs were flawed from birth but did not stop me from getting here.
I have grown into my voice.
I have run from border to border to better know where I live.
I sat down to better know where I stand.
I have fallen for things and people.
I have held firm to beliefs and ideals.
I have stood in the shadow of greatness and learned to cast a shadow of greatness.
I can never go back to the beginning
Each day brings me closer to the end.
Each moment serves me new nuggets of wisdom.
Each friend brings more knowledge and hope.
Knowing what I know, seeing what I've seen
it's time to radiate life from the core of my being.


Feb 3, 2017

Wake up
Wake up
The dream has become the nightmare has become the dream.
I got it wrong
A revolution comes full circle
The beginning is the end is the beginning
A cycle of repetition
The revolution does not bring me some place new
it brings me back again from what I left.
Wake up
or I will be here again too soon
water flows into the bowl filling up to flush down.
Then it fills again only to do it again.
Same bowl different crap.
If I am the water
I want to fill the cup, not the bowl
to hydrate the body to cleanse the soul.
It is time to wake up, to break the cycle, to end the revolution.
I wake up and make my life a line.
From birth to death,
The next moment unknown.
I no longer will race back to a beginning I know from an end I don’t want.
The cycle repeats because of the perceived comfort in knowing what is.
In knowing I can prepare for pain.
I embrace un-knowing.
I have no need for pain.
The revolution which just began, has just ended.
It ended when I woke up.
I don’t know what comes next
The cycle is broken.
I lovingly step into the moment to embrace a loving un-known.
If a loving GOD is the force that set all hearts to beating
And that heart beats with purpose based on a foundation of love.
I have one prayer as I proceed with passion
“Love’s will be done”
I am awake.

at the intersection

Feb 2, 2017

The revolution begins at the crossroads
where reasonable objection meets moral obligation.
A place where continuing with the same is just not bearable any longer.
The revolution begins with a pause
a moment of reflection
possibly a full stop.
When it begins it does not move swiftly.
The movement is calculated.
For turning one hundred eighty degrees brings one back to the place
that birthed the path, the process that needs to be turned from.
The revolution should not be an evolution of the unwanted.
The revolution should be the birth of something all together new.
A new thing created in love
A creation protected by love
not nurtured in fear, doubt, frustration or anger.
The revolution begins at the crossroads.
The revolution may be simply staying put ceasing to move further
along a path that is unfruitful, unfulfilling, unhealthy.
The revolution might possibly begin nurturing the charred soil in preparation
of new growth, new hope, new possibilities.
The revolution need not be violent.
It should be caring, loving.
The revolution is inside me.
It is also inside you.
It lovingly aches to come out, to be born in the world.
It yearns to vibrate throughout the universe as a word, as a song, as an action.
We will recognize the revolutionaries, for they will radiate.
They will shine, Oh, they will shine.
The radiance of the revolution will illuminate even the darkest of places depositing hope, love.
There will be love in abundance.
Lay down your arms.
Open your mind.
Open your heart.
Each of us was created in love.
This is the crossroads.

Dreamcatcher BF
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